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Episode #83: Season Finale – Mafia Life Frank!

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Featuring:  Booze, Belasco, Dr. P
Producer: Booze, Belasco, Dr. P

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Welcome to our Season Finale!*

Meet Frank. Frank is an Italian gentleman who pretends to be in the Mafia. He rides a mobility scooter and is, we discovered, a bit deaf. Frank is also a massive Idiot of Facebook and, if you’re a very lucky lady, he’ll send you a picture of his penis.

Usually, we don’t encourage interaction with the Idiots. We frown upon Catfishing, Dogbowling, Fish Tanking AND Mudsharking. This time, though… things got a bit out of hand.  Frank ended up on the show.

Except that Frank thinks he’s being interviewed live by a New Zealand radio station. I wonder how he got that idea?

In our special Season Finale News Round, we meet a Chinese Chinadecorator who put something somewhere it shouldn’t have gone, a man who REALLY loves pool floats (again), and we ask if it’s ever okay to give a woman a great big kick up the arse.

Our Agony Aunt Bane off of Batman is still searching for gainful employment after not getting a part in the Superman Vs Batman movie. This week he’s looking after mutated kittens in Iraq, where he meets some very exuberant young gentlemen with fireworks.

There’s some personal hygiene advice for the BDSM community, and we ask Should Belasco Watch This Film? Hopefully for the last time ever.

Oh, and… Spoiler Alert… one of us dies.

Did we mention this is our Season Finale?

So stick this in your ear, and remember… everybody wants to be a gangster until a gangster walks in the room. Apparently.

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Episode #74: Sweet Feathery Christmas!

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Featuring:  The Ed, Booze, Belasco, Dr. P
Producer: Booze, Belasco
Cover art by Dr. P

 

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74

Climb aboard the SFJ Open Sleigh, my honkeys!

We meet some Idiots of Facebook who are preparing for the holiday as if it was an episode of Jeremy Kyle. Then, we discover that Belasco’s hatred of the Yuletide is due to his jealousy of Santa’s thick, lustrous beard.

Our old buddy, The Ed, calls in to sing some songs, share his festive views on forced sterilization, and to tell us he’ll be happy to come on our Christmas show when we record it.
Bane has found it hard to get work since that Batman movie, but has found some seasonal work at the mall.

Later, we tour Europe trying to find one country that doesn’t celebrate Christmas with a gigantic festival of racism.

So Merry Christmas. And fuck Belgium!
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Links

  • 00:00 – Intro
  • 1:48 -Does P have a Smart Phone? Dan Wyatt he does!
  • 1:37 -Ask Bane
  • 4:14 -The Ed from Vegas
  • 11:22 – Idiots of Facebook
  • 11:40 – Hubcaps Donna’s DNA Test
  • 13:47 – Christmas with Duct Tape Lisa
  • 20:19 – Dr P’s News Round
  • 20:38 – Jews up the Chimney/Black Pete (http://dailym.ai/18VG9UR)
  • 24:07 – Kamikaze Shopper (http://dailym.ai/18VG9o1)
  • 27:40 – Elf Groping Mall Santa (http://dailym.ai/18VGcQH)
  • 31:01 – Swampy the SFJ Personal Hygiene Pussy
  • 32:15 – The Ed on Ink, Society, and the Guy Who Plays Drew Carey
  • 37:58 – Should Belasco Watch this Christmas film
  • 40:08 – Christmas Memories* (may involve a Fonzie pinball machine and father/son black eyes)
  • 43:45 – Closer
  • 43:59 – A Christmas in Tongues

 

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Episode #68: Dungeons & Dragons Championship of the World

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Featuring:  Booze, Belasco, Dr. P
Producer: Booze

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68

That’s right, everyone. After prolonged negotiations, SFJ host Belasco has managed to secure us the rights to broadcast the most important event in the nerd-stroke-dweeb calendar. For people who like dressing up in leather jerkins and wizard hats this is the World Cup, World Series, and  Super Bowl (full of Cheetos) all rolled into one.  It’s the D&D Championship of the World!

Meanwhile, we meet weak-bowelled Ronald Strong, AKA “The Poo Man”, hunky Italian YouTube sensation and possible brain cancer sufferer Stefano! plays us what might be his best song ever, and we wish the best of luck to a lovely couple of sex change kidz.

All this and lots and lots of Liquid Ass.

Have fun, guys!

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Links

  • 00:00 – Holland & Dozier
  • 02:03 – Intro
  • 02:30 – D&D Championship of the World pt. 1
  • 04:23 – Stefano! Bites the Dust (http://bit.ly/18ieZbw)
  • 05:53 – Dr. P’s News Round
  • 06:09 – Bathroom Befoulment (http://bit.ly/13BciwY)
  • 13:16 – Swampy!
  • 14:09 – Liquid Ass Goes to Bible Camp (http://bit.ly/13Bcht3)
  • 17:25 – Gender Swap Love (http://bit.ly/13Bce0u)
  • 24:18 – D&D Championship of the World pt. 2
  • 25:37 – Dr. P and Booze Play D&D
  • 33:28 – Idiots of Facebook
  • 36:00 – D&D Championship of the World pt. 3
  • 36:56 – Closer

 

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Episode #66: Swampy!

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Featuring:  Booze, Belasco, Dr. P
Producer: Booze

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66In which official SFJ mascot Swampy dispenses valuable hygiene advice for our younger listeners, a Korean Chinaman Woman sticks Crisco-stroke-Crisp ‘n Dry into her head and Dr P promises to box a kangaroo. As long as the kangaroo agrees to abide by the Marquess of Queensbury rules.

We discover that the Dalai Lama of Facebook is a bloke called Dave, criticise the production values of a Chinese Monkey Bear Circus and show our still missing friend Hiccup just how much we love him.

All this and the return of When Tortoises Attack. It’s a scene, man!

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Links

 

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Episode #65: Eel Lovers

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Featuring:  Booze, Belasco, Dr. P, and Hiccup
Producer: Booze

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Eel Lovers PicI bet you think you love your cat, right? But do you love it enough to let it set up home in your small intestine? We meet a man so fond of his elongated fish, he let it do just that. High five!

We try desperately to get somebody under the age of 35 to listen to the podcast by hitching our wagon to the “Haul Video” craze sweeping YouTube, and take a look at the badly spelled conspicuous parenting competition taking place amongst the Idiots of Facebook.

Booze is inconsolable about the passing of a great British stateswoman, Dr. P asks some important questions about below stairs lady hair, Belasco’s head nearly explodes at least twice and Hiccup forgets everything that happened on the last podcast. Which is well handy as it means we can spring the same surprises on him all over again.

All this and much much more, edited down to less than 38 minutes to fit your busy lifestyle. No, that’s okay. You’re welcome!

SPECIAL OFFER: If your name is Hector, you can listen to this podcast for free. Simply enter the code “HECTOR” into the comment box below.

Links

  • 00:38 – Intro/Thatcher
  • 02:33 – Ask Bane
  • 04:35 – Haul videos
  • 10:50 – Lady-scaping
  • 14:44 – Idiots of Facebook
  • 22:03 – Dr. P’s News Round
  • 22:15 – Eel Lover (http://bit.ly/11AgbVj)
  • 29:46 – Bums Strike Back (http://abcn.ws/11AglvJ)
  • 34:20 – Dead Dad Advice
  • 36:12 – Outro

 

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