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137: The Beautiful Bright Blue Bell-Bottoms of Bill Bixby

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We’ve got a jam-packed episode.  Not only is there another appearance by our good friend Bane (off of Batman), but we meet a new friend of the show known as Dr. Brain.  He’s the biggest YouTube sensation since Stefano and will enlighten us with a wealth of knowledge that could only come from a deep, rich understanding of how to look up things on Wikipedia.

Booze shares with us how the UK looks out for blind citizens in public toilets and Prof. Chuck Turtleman spends time with the Marvel Cinematic Universe’s “The Incredible Hulk”.  Astute listeners know that the Incredible Hulk has a connection to Bill Bixby. Well, we wouldn’t be the number one Bill Bixby podcast on the Internet if we failed to tell you he was also in a movie called “Clambake” with a guy named Elvis (DuckDuckGo him for more info).  Belasco will tell us all about that and share some music history.

The News Round, as you’ve come to expect, is full of sex and drugs.  We’ll go dumpster diving for some choice cuts of blubber and get embraced by the tentacles of ecstacy.  Also, you might remember a little song we produced called “Robot Hand”. The good news is, we’ve updated it.  The great news is, it’s migrated to another part of the body.

So, cram this one up one of those places where you can hear it real nice.

Booze on Twitter: @sfjdotcom
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Episode #107: Australian Hijack!

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Featuring:  Booze, Beardo, Chuck Turtleman
Producer: Beardo, Turtleman, Booze

 

Hi there friends, it’s me, Beardo. In this very special (and your favourite) episode of the Sweet Feathery Jesus podcast, the person in control is me, Beardo. That’s right, your favourite Australian/Clevelander, Beardo, has hijacked SFJ. But don’t worry, those other two guys are on it too.

In this episode, we discuss my sweet cephalopodic tattoos, and Booze takes us to the far East, where Chuck and I have to tell the difference between President Obama and his Chinese ChinaLookalike. While in the Asian ChinaRegions, we are also forced to experience another episode of Oi Me Co-Lon by the tyrannical and megalomaniac British member of the SFJ team.

Professor Chuck Turtleman is granted permission to launch his News Copter, and he brings us three stories that all involve dicks in some way, as is his custom.

We also welcome a new bit that has a wonderful jingle, but highly objectionable content, from our correspondent in MassAHHchussettes, Dicky (yes, also phallic).

All this, a lesbian with a strap-on, and a discussion on where to urinate in one’s kitchen, on this very special episode of Sweet Feathery Jesus.

So bang a black billy, stick us in your aural orifices, and listen to the best ever episode of SFJ.

Your friend,

Beardo

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Episode #106: World’s Biggest Dick!

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Featuring:  Booze, Beardo, Chuck Turtleman
Producer: Booze, Beardo, Turtleman

 

Tempers fray on the podcast this week, as suspiciously “refreshed” sounding technophobe Chuck Turtleman has trouble (again) with his recording set-up, and Booze and Beardo have to painstakingly talk him through troubleshooting it. Step by step. Over the phone. Between three different continents. For over an hour. Which was a bit like trying to get a chimpanzee to fix Apollo 13.

This tension carries over into the show, and two beloved SFJ segments are abandoned for good.

Chuck takes up the copter (without asking for permission) for the News Round, in which a hippy from Hawaii has bollocks for brains and a dolphin as a midwife, and Beardo’s homeland is sprouting up messiahs left, right and center. We also examine the world’s largest penis, but come to find that the biggest dick on the internet may in fact be one (or all) of us. But don’t worry, this episode has at least one monkey in it, and a healthy dose of casual racism. So wrap your dolphin-proof panties over your 19-inch member, pray to Aussie Jesus(es), and jam us tight into your ear-holes for a very special episode of the Sweet Feathery Jesus podcast!

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Episode #86: Mr. Dong Meets Mr. Chin

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Featuring:  Dr. P, Booze, Belasco

Producer: Booze, Dr. P 

Ni hao, my honkies!

It’s a Chinapeople extravaganza this week as we see what cheese-loving Naughty Leader Kim Jong-Il Jr. has been up to, infiltrate an oriental graverobbing bicyclist ring and introduce Mr. Dong to Mr. Chin. If you’ll pardon the expression.

Changing the subject completely, Booze shows us Belgium’s most disappointing penis, somebody called “Chuck Turtleman” steals Dr. P’s News ‘Copter, and Belasco tells a very, very funny joke.

In SFJ’s Penitentiary Pen Pals, our ovaried offenders include a helpful “youth worker” and a nice young lady who could show Kim Kardashian a thing or two about beverage balancing.

Last, but definitely not least, we catch up with our favorite social media simpleton in a special-length Idiots of Facebook that may or may not end with a beautiful romantic duet.

So take your loved one in your arms, gaze deep into their eyes and… stick it in their ear.

xoxo

 

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Episode #83: Season Finale – Mafia Life Frank!

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Featuring:  Booze, Belasco, Dr. P
Producer: Booze, Belasco, Dr. P

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Welcome to our Season Finale!*

Meet Frank. Frank is an Italian gentleman who pretends to be in the Mafia. He rides a mobility scooter and is, we discovered, a bit deaf. Frank is also a massive Idiot of Facebook and, if you’re a very lucky lady, he’ll send you a picture of his penis.

Usually, we don’t encourage interaction with the Idiots. We frown upon Catfishing, Dogbowling, Fish Tanking AND Mudsharking. This time, though… things got a bit out of hand.  Frank ended up on the show.

Except that Frank thinks he’s being interviewed live by a New Zealand radio station. I wonder how he got that idea?

In our special Season Finale News Round, we meet a Chinese Chinadecorator who put something somewhere it shouldn’t have gone, a man who REALLY loves pool floats (again), and we ask if it’s ever okay to give a woman a great big kick up the arse.

Our Agony Aunt Bane off of Batman is still searching for gainful employment after not getting a part in the Superman Vs Batman movie. This week he’s looking after mutated kittens in Iraq, where he meets some very exuberant young gentlemen with fireworks.

There’s some personal hygiene advice for the BDSM community, and we ask Should Belasco Watch This Film? Hopefully for the last time ever.

Oh, and… Spoiler Alert… one of us dies.

Did we mention this is our Season Finale?

So stick this in your ear, and remember… everybody wants to be a gangster until a gangster walks in the room. Apparently.

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Episode #72: Cowboy Porn for the Blind

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Featuring:  Booze, Belasco, Dr. P
Producer: Booze

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72In which two of the hosts mourn the sad passing of rock’n’roll curmudgeon Lou Reed with the help of Italian YouTube sensation Stefano and some terrible karaoke. It’s what he would have wanted.

We ask if blind people really get sexually excited by the idea of two staunchly heterosexual gentlemen sharing a blow-up doll and a cowboy hat, Rihanna solves crimes like a scantily clad Jessica Fletcher and our host Belasco can’t tell the difference between a swan and a duck.

A Chinese Chinaman leaves home without his penis, a mother proves her love for her son by demolishing a school and a naughty lady lays an egg in Dr P’s hat.

So put on your leather chaps, invite your best buddy over and take turns sticking this in each others’ earholes. 

Yeeehaw!

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