The Official Modern Warfare 2 Thread

[melon]

The hour is nearly at hand. Modern Warfare 2 drops in a little over an hour Central Time. Hopefully this thread will encourage people to get this game and join us for some quality gaming and laughs (the most important thing) It's all about having fun. :tip:

So I know Booze is down, and Spooner wants to hear what i gotta say.

I'll post some impressions later tonight.

[Booze]

My first impressions are that they've done a good job. There are enough differences that it feels like a proper new game & not just a map pack with a couple of new weapons, but they haven't fucked with the gameplay too much.

There are tons of new perks to wrap your head around, & new challenges to get through. It's still as addictive as fuck.

One good thing I noticed. The host got disconnected on one of the maps I played, & instead of bumping us all back to the lobby, there was just a slight pause while it chose a new host from the rest of the players. Then we carried on from where we left off.

Queers still abound on multiplayer though. I played my first game 3 hours after it'd officially been released in Britain, & there was one fella who had leveled up to 28. His gamertag was Bear_Grylls. No shit.

[Spooner]

Bear_Grylls? I knew fuckin' Ed was buyin' that game.

I'm headin' out in the drivin'-ass rain to pick mine up. It's not hard to admit, but I ain't lookin' forward to standing in the middle of a Baby Huey convention. Not even a little bit.

But, I'm already seein' spots, so I hope I can get my second wind when I get home and maybe Melwood'll do the right thing and decide to call in sick to work tomorrow. Then it's an all-nighter. All the way. lol

[melon]

Two things Ed has trouble with: Bears and Grills

[Spooner]

You got fuckin' lucky, Mel. I'm in the rain surrounded by about 80 Dogberts, half of them in fatigues and three even have canteens & C rations. One is freely fapping and two are playing some game that has 30-sided dice. Five are talking about Transformer movies, and there's one dumb cunt who looks like she hasn't shat in a weej. And I didn't think the night could get worse after that Denver tank job. Sheeeeeezus.

[melon]

lmao It'll be worth it. Trust me.

[Spooner]

Hooooooleeeeeee shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit.

All's I gotsta say. Me & Melon pulled off a few sessions of Deathmatch & Domination, and ... well ... divorce proceedings will probably begin before the week's out. Ain't no game gonna come close ta this one in at least three years. :tip:

[Belasco]

... two are playing some game that has 30-sided dice...

Why you takin' cheap shots?

[Spooner]

lmao lmao lmao ... That's Sav's shtick; when I think of mega-sided dice, I think of Dogbert, not you, big daddy. :tip:


So here's the worst part of this all: I stay up way past my bed time to get in a few rounds with Melon, and he's already two hours ahead of me, so it's even worse for him. My woman wakes me out of the sleep of the dead at the crack of mama's ass to take her to yet another one of her 8 billion babeh apperntments.

I can't be pullin' this three hours' sleep shit at 40. Not happenin'. I've been speaking in tongues since 7:45 this morning. This kid ain't even born yet and it's already REALLLLLLLLY pissin' me off!!!

[Spooner]

Lemme tell ya, the multiplayer is goddamn PANDEMONIUM up in this whore. The perkage is incalculable; you can get perks on top of the perks you get on top of your regular perks. They're endless. One perk even lets you throw a pair of hard shoes up on some power lines so they hang by the laces.

There's a couple sweet 3rd-World perks, too. There's a perk called Safe Circus Seal that allows you to put a cork in your asshole and wear a condom so you don't get the AIDS whilst swimming across the filthy Haji water. This game's worth every penny.

[The Sav]

Wait... one... goddamn minute! I NEVER associated Belasco with swamp trolls, 50 sided-dice, or little midgets running around wearing cloaks and holding staffs n' shit. I, like you, made a generic comment about said "culture/lifestyle" and then Belasco stuck his head into the noose and got defensive (jokingly, of course... but still), thus implicating himself.

Had I KNOWN that our beloved leader and all around guy who can make life miserable for people at SFJ, liked... no loved thorny faced dragons, elves, and tree-dwelling mammals with magical powers, prior to my initial statements; I would have steered WAAAAAAAAY clear of any such comments that could be mistaken as cruel or mean spirited.

Words like "virgin", "geek", "loser", "basement", "mom's house" "lair" "garage" "fap" "secret" "spell" "lightning bolt" or "sleep" and the phrase "no girls allowed" are just not words I chose to use when discussing SFJ's top pimp.

[moneymaker]

This kid ain't even born yet and it's already REALLLLLLLLY pissin' me off!!!

Wait until you get the bills....including hospital, maternity ward, anesthesiologist, lab, security baby monitoring surcharge, pediatrician, and obstetrician.

Think I'm joking?

[Spooner]

Sav! :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Maker, when Creed Bratton gets in debt, he transfers his debt <holds up fake passport> to William Charles Schneider.

[Spooner]

You guys don't know what yer missin'. All's I can say right now. Me, Boozerelli, & Melon had a huge session tonight and I ain't had that much of a riot playin' a video game ... ever. Just buy it now, ask questions later. We need one or two more assholes to join in for a full SFJ squad.

[the deta]

http://i48.photobucket.com/albums/f207/Lorna100/Political%20For%20DT/belowsi.gif

[moneymaker]

lmao lmao lmao

[Spooner]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wH6GXjKE7og

[The Sav]

I wonder why they feel the need to post weekly results/stats when we know that ED is always ranked #1 in every category, every week.

[Spooner]

lmao lmao lmao ... To borrow a line: According to Ed, saying HE has a fapping problem is like telling Michael Jordan he has a basketball problem.

[melon]

Opening day sales numbers for MW2.


For months, Activision has been predicting that Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 would be the biggest launch in entertainment history. So it comes as little surprise today that the Infinity Ward-developed shooter has indeed broken all previous records for day-one game sales.

More people picked up Modern Warfare 2 on launch day than any other game in history.

According to figures released by Activision, the sequel to Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare sold over one third of its forebear's 14 million life-to-date sales in 24 hours in just three territories. Some 4.7 million units of the game were sold on November 10 in the US, UK, and Canada, generating $310 million dollars. By comparison, the biggest US day-one film gross, The Dark Knight, took in $158.4 million during its July 20, 2008 premiere.

With UK sales of 1.32 million units announced yesterday, Modern Warfare 2's North American total comes to 3.38 million units. Some analysts predicted that the game would sell as many as 7 million units when other territories are included, although that total now seems a little high.

Modern Warfare 2's UK and NA numbers best Grand Theft Auto IV's global day-one sales of 3.6 million units, which also generated $310 million in sales--but in all territories worldwide. Released for the PC, PlayStation 3, and Xbox 360, the new Call of Duty made more money in one day than Halo 3 did in one week, although Microsoft and Bungie's sci-fi shooter was exclusive to the Xbox 360.

[Spooner]

That is fucking incredible. Truly. And, I'm happy to be one of the 3.38 million assholes who's ruining his life and marriage with this game. There are no other video games after this. I've burned all my other ones as I no longer need 'em. Well, 'cept Forza 3 on accounna the hilarious and hellacious races we have.

[Dr. P]

I'm surprised it topped GTA 4, which wasn't mentioned, but I thought sold a shitload more than Halo. How different/better is this than regular COD4, MW? I'm strapped and saving up for a gun, but *am* tempted.

[the deta]

Dude i was playing this game last night and the controller actually messaged my balls!

-Spoon

[TheWagesofSin]

Dude i was playing this game last night and the controller actually messaged my balls!

-Spoon
lmao lmao That coulda been funny, too.




Your you're own worst enemy sometimes, Eddie.


FAIL

[the deta]

lmao lmao lmao


Fuck you man, thats all part of my genius.

[moneymaker]

Dude i was playing this game last night and the controller actually messaged my balls!

-Spoon

lmao lmao lmao

Well, did his balls PM back?!?

[Spooner]

lmao lmao lmao


Fuck you man, thats all part of my genius.

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:



Fuckin' mountain hesh.

[melon]

Great line by Booze after a poor performance: "look away...i'm hideous" lmao lmao

I'm throwing that up as my XBL motto :tip:

[Spooner]

lmao

Another great Booze line, making a comment about getting lit up 30 times with dual-wielding machine guns: "Yeah, yer ... pretty lively wif dem fings."

[Spooner]

Rollin' in a team deathmatch with Jiggerheiser tonight, and when the game first starts, the 9 choads spawn about, I dunno, maybe 30 yards from end to end. Jigger's way down in front of me and busts a left down the street into the action (I'm up on a hill). Keep in mind, only about 4 seconds of the game have passed. As I get to the bottom of the hill, I see Niggerheiser come runnin' outta the garage next to me, which meant in that FOUR-SECOND time window, he already got shot in the fuckin' face and respawned. Not 6 seconds ... NOT 10 ... 4.

4 seconds.



How can ya not love that.

[Heap]

That really puts gamin' into perspective...tell ya what...

[Booze]

Rollin' in a team deathmatch with Jiggerheiser tonight, and when the game first starts, the 9 choads spawn about, I dunno, maybe 30 yards from end to end. Jigger's way down in front of me and busts a left down the street into the action (I'm up on a hill). Keep in mind, only about 4 seconds of the game have passed. As I get to the bottom of the hill, I see Niggerheiser come runnin' outta the garage next to me, which meant in that FOUR-SECOND time window, he already got shot in the fuckin' face and respawned. Not 6 seconds ... NOT 10 ... 4.

4 seconds.



How can ya not love that.

I bet I could do it in 3.

[Spooner]

lmao



Melon discovered that he and I have played now 24 full hours of this goddamn silly game. I remember I'd stopped looking at that time stat in COD4 once I got into the high 20's (and that's DAYS, boys, not hours).

I was telling Melon how bad it'll be to be on our death beds, knowing we wasted like 37 days of our lives on video games killing 9-year-olds in Wisconsin named shit like "Curtis The Ninja." Oh, it's gonna be grim.

[Booze]

:rofl: :rofl:

Well, I'm about ready to waste some more time on it. Who's down?

[Spooner]

I'm there. (Just sawr this.)

[Franktortuga]

probably the best game ive ever played

[Dr. P]

If I knew Frank would friend me, I'd buy this thing.

[Spooner]

Frank getting friend requests is like Sadie Hawkins day.

[melon]

probably the best game ive ever played

Its so good, you left your Cuntainment Unit to post this. (oh, and I agree with you :tip:)

[Spooner]

Modern Warfare 2 Makes British Kid Cry&nbsp;Video@@AMEPARAM@@http://embed.break.com/1498990@@AMEPARAM@@1498990 (http://www.break.com/index/modern-warfare-2-makes-british-kid-cry.html)

[Booze]

:rofl::rofl::rofl:

Put that little Limey shit up against Angry German Kid & ask yerself... how did we ever win the war?

They should've shown that vid on huge screens at the memorial service on 11/11. To show the veterans what they fought for.

I bet Churchill is spinning in his gigantic grave. Jesus.

Lucky he didn't get really upset though. That's a supporting wall.

[Spooner]

lmao

I bet he's related to Neville Chamberlain.

[Franktortuga]

ill friend request you

[Booze]

You wouldn't like Frank when he's angry.

[Spooner]

I think Frank's all mobbed up. I'm gonna decline.

[Dr. P]

I heard that shit on O&A today, beauty to actually see it. Anthony is BIG into this game. As soon as I can pay for my new gun, I'm grabbin' this thing. Has anyone played the single player? Supposedly, there is an airport scene that is fuckin' BRUTAL! Everyone in the airport is unarmed, and all have to die!

[Hole In Face]

That sounds sweet, though I heard it was a train station. Either way, killing innocent people is fun.

[melon]

I heard that shit on O&A today, beauty to actually see it. Anthony is BIG into this game. As soon as I can pay for my new gun, I'm grabbin' this thing. Has anyone played the single player? Supposedly, there is an airport scene that is fuckin' BRUTAL! Everyone in the airport is unarmed, and all have to die!

Thanks for the spoiler ASShole! J/k

I looked up Cumia's gamertag "Noodles61" and he don't play shit.

[melon]

You should get MW2 first to get ideas on what guns to buy.

[Dr. P]

Thanks for the spoiler ASShole! J/k

I looked up Cumia's gamertag "Noodles61" and he don't play shit.

Why you think I just bought an M-4 and am getting a P.22 this week? j/k Do you listen? He admits to sucking in a big way, played every game until this one on PC, w/mouse and keyboard. Hearing him rail on high-pitched 12 year old boys calling him faggot has MADE the show the last few days, and I haven't even played this game yet.

[Spooner]

Russ, did they give you a free subscription to Soldier of Fortune magazine?









lol






j/k





goofin'







/quack

[Dr. P]

Yeah, yeah. You'd LOVE shooting this stuff, dude. LOVE it.

[Spooner]

I'd love to throw a clip of dum dums in that thing and go to work on the freeways of Wershin'ton & Oregon, tell ya what.

[Spooner]

Here ya go, Melon ... there was a kid in the lobby yesterday whose name was "xKurtisHasWeedx" ... no joke.

[melon]

^^lmao lmao

After hearing that Patrice interview about the airport scene. i GOtTa ply that shit!

[Spooner]

Better than the knife throw is listening to the stoner kids' reactions at the replay.

http://www.break.com/game-trailers/game/modern-warfare-2/modern-warfare-2-amazing-knife-throw-kill.html

[Spooner]

Just unlocked the javelin missile, didn't know what the fuck it did, but here's what it does. Good gawd. Can you imagine me droppin' these fuckers on sniper camp positions? Oh ... it's gonna be beautiful.


FF to the 0:45 mark.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eCpGViPSKko

[vegassteven]

lemme chime in:

i just finished arkham asylum, so i will be trading that and a load of other stuff in to get MW2. i almost went for NHL10 but realized that i never play those games more than a few days.

[TheWagesofSin]

How 'bout you stop posting, and we'll just call it even Steven.

[moneymaker]

How 'bout you stop posting, and we'll just call it even Steven.

lmao lmao lmao

[melon]

lemme chime in:

i just finished arkham asylum, so i will be trading that and a load of other stuff in to get MW2. i almost went for NHL10 but realized that i never play those games more than a few days.

i almost wanna sell all my games, cuz the only thing i'll be playing is some MW2.

[vegassteven]

i almost wanna sell all my games, cuz the only thing i'll be playing is some MW2.

gamestop is doing some promo for another week in my market (vegas) and i presume all over though where if you trade in over 6 games they give you 40% extra on all the games.

so with mine, i ended up getting $32.50 for batman... i had some crappy games, but that didnt matter, the bigger value games were bumped up a lot with the extra credit.

[TheWagesofSin]

so with mine, i ended up getting $32.50 for batman...

You big dummy. Beans said he's willing to pay $300 for that.

[Booze]

:rofl:

Or, if you'd waited 10 years, Ed would've bought it off you.

[the deta]

Nope i already have Batman. It was awesome.

[melon]

Ultra-Realistic Modern Warfare Game Features Awaiting Orders, Repairing Trucks | The Onion - America's Finest News Source (http://www.theonion.com/content/video/ultra_realistic_modern_warfare)

[Dr. P]

lmao!

[melon]

Just had my best game: 31-5, with 2 pavelow strikes!!

[Belasco]

Just had my best game: 31-5, with 2 pavelow strikes!!

Is that the part where somebody rings a bell and your mouth waters?

[Hole In Face]

Just had my best game: 31-5, with 2 pavelow strikes!!

That's awesome. That's awesome to the max.

[Nickenheiser]

Just had my best game: 31-5, with 2 pavelow strikes!!

thats fucking awesome but... vids or it didnt happen. (jokes)

ive been wondering if the pavelow is worth a killstreak point, how many fags were you shelling each pavelow? biggest killstreak??

[melon]

The Pavelow is alot harder to take down, and it shoots flares. I got about 10 kills from both, (the second got taken down quick)

[Booze]

What's a 'killstreak'? lol.

[Nickenheiser]

lmao lmao lmao lmao lmao

[melon]

45 kills bitches, and I got 2 witnesses.

[Spooner]

I can't keep track of them shits, Mel ... which one is "the howler" and which is one is the Pave? I thought the AC130 was that big fuckin' air pig what shits out the flares and drops the screamin' mimis. I gotta change my killstreak shit now.

[Belasco]

I'm lovin this game. I still suck-ass, but that's not the games fault. That airport level was stunning. I flashed back to every delay, bump, cancellation, and bitchy stewardess I've ever dealt with. I had become death... destroyer of worlds. I almost enjoyed it too much.

[Nickenheiser]

I can't keep track of them shits, Mel ... which one is "the howler" and which is one is the Pave? I thought the AC130 was that big fuckin' air pig what shits out the flares and drops the screamin' mimis. I gotta change my killstreak shit now.

"the howler" is the AC130 = the huge gun plane what you control and gots 3 different weapons

the pave low is the big fat helicopter with extra armor and flares

[Spooner]

There's an airplane what has flares, too. I guess that's the one what's fuckin' me up. The one where you and I have to take it out by firing stingers at the cunt simultaneously.

BTW, gimme a call when you're ready to scrub down, stoner.

[melon]

MY goddamn wireless mic ate shit last night. Now i gotta call Abdul (aka Ted) and get him to fix my shit. Fuck.

[Belasco]

Oh, melon... Will you ever win?









j/k

[Spooner]

MY goddamn wireless mic ate shit last night. Now i gotta call Abdul (aka Ted) and get him to fix my shit. Fuck.

Dude, ain't ya got at least 10 of them cheap wired ones what came with your 11 Xboxes? Use one for backup ... it's fag-killin' season.

[The Sav]

Listen up, niggers!

It's go time in t-minus 1 hour!!!

No one, not even Mrs. The Sav, The heir of Sav, The mini-Sav or the little Savette can stop this from happening.

[melon]

Dude, nobodys playing MW2 anymore. We've all moved onto Limey Cricket League 2010, knocking down pipes and shit.

[The Sav]

Dude, nobodys playing MW2 anymore. We've all moved onto Limey Cricket League 2010, knocking down pipes and shit.

Sure... And when you guys become bored with that game after say, 2.4 minutes of gameplay, you'll all be back to MWII. Wait... I'll give Booze 10 minutes before he's back playing Bejeweled on his iPod, but only because he's a limey.

[Spooner]

Sav back in the MW2 shit-twister has already started with a bang. Not four seconds into the first lobby, Sav sees some jerkoff's name and goes, "Oh look, we've got DumpsterFucker in here." :rofl:

[melon]

IW set to fix the Javelin Jihad glitch.

http://www.1up.com/do/newsStory?cId=3177164

[Booze]

Wait... I'll give Booze 10 minutes before he's back playing Bejeweled on his iPod, but only because he's a limey.

It's good to have you back, Sav. So I'll spare you my retort. But it was 99% certain to include the word "solitaire".

:poke:

[Spooner]

lmao


They can't fix this glitch fast enough. Tonight, the game was almost unplayable. Even as a kid, lemming/mob mentality deeply disturbed me, but it's more rampant today than ever. One faggot walks around doing something gay, and within two hours, half the faggots on there are lemming the motherfucker, farting in the MW2 elevator.

I think that me, Melon, & The Sav should be on the goddamn board of directors for this whore game. My first rule would be, anyone (besides the first jerkoff) who used the javelin glitch gets their Xbox banned -- Niggerheiser style (and, cousin, that's permanent). The sign would be like GH in South Park: "YOU'RE ----------- A ----------- FAG!" No other words. Then their Xbox emits some Phillip K. Dick-style robot spiders that crawl out and spray cyanide in their faces. Then when their faggot moms come home, they see Curtis The Ninja face down on the floor, and try to flush the spider down the terlet ... but at the last second, the spider shoots out expando legs and prevents itself from being flushed. Then it sprays cyanide in Mom's face ... and ... I dunno ... maybe she shits on the floor, too. I'm thinkin' along them lines. FOR OPENERS.

[The Sav]

It's good to have you back, Sav. So I'll spare you my retort. But it was 99% certain to include the word "solitaire".

:poke:

Well thanks for being such a good pal, Booze. So with that, I will return the favor and not mention the words "Ballad" "Gay" or "Tony" when discussing your video gaming.... lifestyle. :tip:

[Booze]

:rofl:

Sonic The Hedgehog is on special offer in the arcade this week. I must admit... I'm tempted.

[Hole In Face]

Then their Xbox emits some Phillip K. Dick-style robot spiders that crawl out and spray cyanide in their faces.

:rofl:

[Hole In Face]

BTW - Last Saturday I went to the Gamestop at the mall to score me a this sweet PS3 deal they had going. You buy a new PS3 and you get MW2 and Infamous for free! FUCK YEAH! Right? Well, first things first. I walk into the faggy asshole mall and immediately walk back out. The mofo is PACKED (obviously) with retarded assholes who think they have priority over anyone else. It was fucking overwhelming for me. So, I stay outside for awhile, smoked a few cigs preping myself to handle the bullshit that was about to happen and not end up in jail for manslaughter.

I walk straight towards the gamestop shoulder checking anyone who walks in my path. I get there and wait in line for what seems to be about 30 or so minutes listening to douchebag questions complaints, etc. I finally get my turn. I say "Give me that new slim PS3 with the 2 game deal." The fuckhole says "Well, we don't have anymore slim PS3s or copies of MW2. You can get a different game if you want. Sorry."

I let out a sigh, shook my head and said forget it. Yeah, I should've expected it a little, but you think they would have prepared for it. Still, it doesn't change the fact that everyone I saw there that day was a worthless asshole and should consider themselves lucky I didn't have a gun on me. Dumbfucks. Worthless asshole dumbfucks...

Another day another time I guess....

[melon]

I loathe Gamestop with the intensity of 1000 suns.

[Nickenheiser]

if only you hustlers knew the beauty of Fred Meyers

god bless the pacific northwest (jokes)

[melon]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cyVXPN06CUo&feature=related


I fixed my wireless headset thanks to this sweet vid!!




Anyhoo, here's what this post is really about:
It's with a heavy heart, and tears welling up in my eyes that I write (type) this. Throughout history many a great man has taken a stand, to fight for what he believes in. Tonight i'm taking that stand. I've had it, it's over. Fuck Microsoft in it's ass. I'm not spending anymore money on this cheap MS shit anymore, fuck it. Today my wired mic broke, apparently it couldn't handle the vigorous demands of me accidentally pulling it out. It lasted 3 days. This has to stop, and it will now. Sorry guys you'll have to have fun without me. I can afford a new mic, it ain't that, but it's a matter of principle, I no longer will feed this beast known as Microsoft anymore.
We'll always have great memories: The Roxbury, Sav eating a rocket on Bog, Booze getting a goose egg on Vacant, Heiser doing the Duck Walk. And we met some great people along the way: LilFag, Bilbo Baggins, and an assortment of ninjas, assassins, snipers, and fags as far as the eye can see. Perhaps i'll still play the occasional game with you guys but don't expect to talk to me, and i'll have to miss all the hilarious chatter. So long fellas it's been a great ride. :tip: WHo am I kidding? I'll probably buy a new headset tomorrow lol

[Pull Out Method]

Hey Melon, want to play MarioKart



































lol

[Spooner]

^^:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[Spooner]

Melon, resentment is drinking a bottle of poison and waiting for the other person to die. I'll feed the beast and send you one for an early Xmas gift. You without yer Xbox is like Maker without a sandy clam pic. I'm havin' none OF this.

[The Sav]

Yeah, Melon. Don't go all agro on us just because Bill Gates has us all by the balls. Doesn't Micropiss have a warrantee on those things? I'm looking into having my Turtle Beach piece of shit replaced, and so far, it looks like it'll happen. Besides, don't you have like 500 games sitting on your shelf? Sell a few of the older unused games to Ed and get yourself a new mic without paying another dime. It's a win/win.

[Spooner]

Shit, Melon ... if anything, sell yer Dell and get a Macbook. That's the best way to shove it up Gates's ass. XBL is sacred. Don't blaspheme.

[Spooner]

As time goes on, I'm gonna assemble the N-wordHeiser Stoner-to-English babel fish translator here. Let's get 'er started today:

"Okay, guys, I'll be on again in a little bit [alt. '... in a little while.']"

English Translation: See you guys in about four or five days.

[melon]

Hey Melon, want to play MarioKart



































lol

Sure, i'll PM you my 74 digit friend code.:tip:

[melon]

Yeah, Melon. Don't go all agro on us just because Bill Gates has us all by the balls. Doesn't Micropiss have a warrantee on those things? I'm looking into having my Turtle Beach piece of shit replaced, and so far, it looks like it'll happen. Besides, don't you have like 500 games sitting on your shelf? Sell a few of the older unused games to Ed and get yourself a new mic without paying another dime. It's a win/win.


i could sell my games to Ed, but i can't buy a new mic with beaver pelts. (swish!)

[The Sav]

As time goes on, I'm gonna assemble the N-wordHeiser Stoner-to-English babel fish translator here. Let's get 'er started today:

"Okay, guys, I'll be on again in a little bit [alt. '... in a little while.']"

English Translation: See you guys in about four or five days.

Nickenese: My xbox RRoD'ed again, so I had to get a new one.

English Translation: Microsoft fried my modded box so I'm borrowing my friend's until I get his modded, then I'm gonna borrow another one.


i could sell my games to Ed, but i can't buy a new mic with beaver pelts. (swish!)

lmao lmao lmao lmao

[melon]

Nickenese lmao lmao lmao

I saw these cheaper Turtle Beach phones what cost the same as the msoft shit. If i was Mr. Plow i'd go out and buy these today.

[Spooner]

Mel, you better get plowin', light-brown negro -- we've got fags to kill, and two soup cans with a string between 'em ain't gonna cut it for the long weekend (my very last weekend as a childless child ... Peter Pan dies the day this kid comes out, then I'll have to stop gaming, grow a Cow stash, and read the Wall Street Journal ... lol ... sigh).

[The BYP]

Ya, but when your kid moves out you can play again. Imagine all the sweet games you can buy with your ssi check!

[Spooner]

I'll be dead before that ... I'll have to set an alarm at 4AM to get my gamin' in. Oh, wait ... that kid'll be waking me at 4 anyway. I really do need to know if holding its ass under the shower head after it shits is harmful. I don't think we have hard water here.


Melon ... SHEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWEEEEEEEEEEEEE, man!! Tell me you were just GOOFIN'. We can't lose our starter, dude.

[melon]

i'll be on in about 10 minutes. (sans mic)

[Spooner]

Melon's new title... :rofl:

[Spooner]

I gotta relay some tales of late here:

There was some faggot called "Remix Ninja" (yeah, I know), and Sav got greased by him like three times in a row, and so he was out for BLOOD. Sav creeps up behind him, knives his t'roat, and goes, "YEAHHHH!!! THASS RIGHT!!! I JUST REMIXED YER FUCKIN' *FACE*!" :rofl:

Niggerheiser was rollin' with a riot shield, and some fag was trying to get over by setting up a sentry gun in front of him. Stoner hits him in the grille twice with his shield and kills him, then knives his sentry gun. Nick goes, "YEAHHHH!! I just smashed yer FACE and broke yer TOY, SON!" Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh :rofl:


Sav: "Duuuuuuuuuude, I just chased this faggot into the back of that airplane and he disappeared, so I stopped and looked up, and I saw his big Bozo the Clown shoes hanging over the edge of the platform, so I jumped up and knifed his T'ROAT!" :rofl: x10000000000000

[Pull Out Method]

Sure, i'll PM you my 74 digit friend code.:tip:

lmao


i could sell my games to Ed, but i can't buy a new mic with beaver pelts. (swish!)

lmao lmao


I'll be dead before that ... I'll have to set an alarm at 4AM to get my gamin' in. Oh, wait ... that kid'll be waking me at 4 anyway. I really do need to know if holding its ass under the shower head after it shits is harmful. I don't think we have hard water here.


Melon ... SHEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWEEEEEEEEEEEEE, man!! Tell me you were just GOOFIN'. We can't lose our starter, dude.

Only harmful if you drop it.

[Spooner]

Just now, me & The Sav were rolling on the Western Estates map, and Sav got greased twice in a row by some camper ... after the third greasing, Sav goes, "Duuuuuuuude ... I ain't gonna let myself get punked by some fag named HAMANDCHEESE!" Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh :rofl: :rofl:

Flash two minutes later: Sav goes, "OHHHHHH YEAHHHHHH! I just put a frag right in his TEETH ... 'YEAHHH! THERE'S yer ham & cheese, faggot." :rofl: x10000000

[melon]

Hieser had a great line in reference to the poppy fields in Afghan: "That won't yield shit".

[Spooner]

Jigger's at his funniest when he rolls MW2. No question.


Sav had an encounter yesterday with some camper called something like xFrost 69420187x

Sav: "Oh, dude ... I just caught Frosty the Snowbitch camping in the attic, and I knifed her face." :rofl:

[Nickenheiser]

stay frosty.

[Spooner]

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:


Nick ... cover me. I'm reloading! THAT'S a kill. Tango down. Reconnoiter at C, sportsfans! Charlie don't surf!








lmao

[Spooner]

**XBL Cabal - Secret Society - He Man She Haters Club - Members Only**

They just released Rust as the new Shipment! OH YEAH, SLUTS! I just went big-game on it, Domination, too -- and I'm not joking, I got greased by Peter Frampton. Straight-up ... PETER FRAMPTON. Good gawd. No, I don't feel like he do.

[melon]

What? They threw Rust in the mix?

[Dr. P]

I'm getting this game for Christmas, you niggers better not be onto a new game by then!

[Booze]

Don't worry, Russ. This game will be our number 1 for a looong time. Maybe even long enough for me to get up to level 40.

[Dr. P]

Man, I'm SO poor not be able to buy a $60 game. But I can't buy it, gotta wait 'til X-mas. Shit has been tight.

[melon]

Walmart has it for $45. The bad thing is you have to go to Walmart.

http://www.walmart.com/search/search-ng.do?search_constraint=0&ic=48_0&search_query=modern+warfare

[Verno]

Picked up a new Xbox and this tonight. Like a fish to water fellas, like a fish to water.


Almost... I'll wander around like Granny at the bread store until I get used to these maps. And what's with these turrets? FYI - I may not come up for air this weekend. I estimate having 24 hours knocked out by Saddaday nite!

[The Sav]

lmao lmao Why did you get rid of your old one to begin with? Were you behind on some lab fees or something?

[Spooner]

Verno, what's yer gamertag, choadmonkey? Me & Mel kept getting suspicious friend invites from someone who just seemed like they wanted to hotchat. If I know it's you, then I'll accept the friend invite, but you'll have to keep the hotchat to an absolute minimum.

[melon]

Just got to Lvl. 70 last night and was blowing holes in faces with my new AK. I was in the zone. I'm off work early today so lets fuckin roll. :tip:

[Booze]

Like you're ever out of the zone, Melchester.

[Spooner]

lmao lmao lmao lmao lmao lmao

No shit, huh. Melon "out of the zone" means his accuracy drops from 99.7 to 96.5%. He's a horrible wingman and an even shittier teammate, ain't he. Fuckin' bum. Melon. What a jerkoff.

[Spooner]

Verno's been a roll, though, tell ya what. Every time I turn around, he's dry-humping a flag in Domination and putting buckshot in everyone's pants what try to stop him -- LET THE DOG FINISH!!

[The Sav]

Man, I was playing two night's ago and I had my ass handed to me in every game, save Rust. I love that map. I dunno if there's still glitches going on or what, but the game said "Free for all" yet we were clearly playing Domination. Needless to say, I had 103 kills and it was glorious. I figured out how to run around like The Flash without a weapon and just knife motherfuckers in the face like what that one guy was doing to us, Spoon. All's you need is a killstreak, then you push the button to hold the flare and.... Kaaaplow!!! No gun! ALL KNIFE! Does it get any better? I say it don't.

[Dr. P]

With any luck, I unwrap a package in about two hours that contains this game. I can't wait, but i know I'm gonna be SO behind all a' you.

[The Sav]

Don't worry, Russ. There's plenty of troop transports and water trucks to stand on in this one. ;-)

[Spooner]

lmao lmao lmao lmao

[Dr. P]

Unfortunately I can't seem to get connected to Xbox live. Which means I can't even play single player, since there's an update required to play this game.

[Spooner]

Don't run the update, Russ; it removes all tanker trucks and wide-open high spots in the middle of each map.

[Dr. P]

You can build houses your whole life and no one calls you Russ the builder, but you stand on one truck to get a good view...

[melon]

Why can't you play single player?

[Dr. P]

It won't play until an update is installed. To install update, I must be hooked up to XBL.

[melon]

You must be hooked up to XBL for it to even know it needs to update. So you should be connected to XBL. I don't know why it won't dl the update. Disconnect the Xbox from the internet and you should be able to play.

[Dr. P]

Giving that a shot now.

I wanted this game to play with you nigs, but I can't for the life of me remember how I had it all hooked up. I had a router, but seems I hooked a really long ethernet cable to the Xbox directly and it played better. Now it's saying my shit ain't hooked up. Maybe my subscription has expired, but surely that'd be the first error I'd get if they wanted another fifty bucks.

[melon]

You don't need a subscription to dl updates.

[Dr. P]

Update *seems* to be installing. Still not sure why a cable from the Xbox to the modem isn't working.

[melon]

Hang on a sec...Does your Xbox Dashboard need to update? Or the MW2 game itself? You probably do need the new Xbox Dashboard update to play the game, if so it must connect to the net to get it.

[Dr. P]

It just says an update from Xbox live is required to play this game. I goes all the way through the seven minute update, then says I can't save my game shit unless I am signed in. I try to sign in, can't, then am prompted to update again. I went through this before, I just can't remember what finally worked. I DO remember that my shit ran way better without a wireless and just going with a direct cable.

[Dr. P]

Got 'er started, holy shit I'm rusty. The game went okay until the climbing mission. I can't even hit the ice with my ice picks. Man, if I fall off this ice cliff one more time, I'm taking this fucin game BACK!

[TheWagesofLOL]

I am TheWagesofSin I won't intrude ehere. But I just want to hang around and monitor lest anyone claim they (he/she/she-male/it/that) are me...which I am, they're not. That's that.

[Dr. P]

What surly cur would do such a thing?

[Spooner]

Russ, you standing on something high to "get a good view" is like a sniper wearing an orange hunter's vest and pink hardhat (and a beard - lol) while standing in the middle of the ice rink at Rockefeller Center, lookin' for targets to hit so no one notices you.



/quack

[Dr. P]

C'mon man. I was new at it.

[Spooner]

I goooooooooooooof. I gooooooooooooooooof. Dude, those were CLASSIC days.

[Booze]

I concur. Those were good times. And Russ, there are tons of things to jump on top of on that airport level. Let's get down (or up), & boogie!

[Spooner]

Russ, Booze put mustard on a Philly chee sando ... and you're gonna blanche about standing on a truck like a statue in a video game? Pshaw.


lolofSin

[Dr. P]

I want this thing connected! The single player is fun, and I'm figuring how to play again, but the chatter and shit was what it's all about.

[Dr. P]

Anyone play the part in Siberia where you are bombing bad guys with predator drones? I've been shooting these assholes for thirty minutes, and it keeps letting me.

[Verno]

I was playing some Deathmatch solo earlier today and this one choad was rolling with this gun that was dropping fools quick. I noticed it was the TAR 21 with a silencer on it. So I tried out the same setup, and let me tell you: this thing drops niggers faster than POM drops cash on Timberlake concert tickets (we'll be beating that dead horse until it looks like a Maker lump of coalsteak).

[The Sav]

Crazy that you mentioned that, because Mrs. The Sav was playing MW2 last night and she put a silencer on her gun (UMP) and she had a similar result. And she needed it because her aim was shit. She'd run up on an enemy and start capping him in the ankle and then KAPOW! Her throat was cut. So then she tweaked a few perks and tried some different gun attachments (mainly the silencer) and that's when her ankle shots started to mean something.

[melon]

That UMP is lethal, she put me down a few times with it. Thats the good thing about Prestiging: it forces you to learn different weapons. The FAMAS for me is my best weapon, add stopping power and if all three bullets hit, it's lights out.

[Spooner]

The distance on the TAR (which I've used regularly now as my red-tigger rig w/my boombastic noob-tube on it, is shit. I'm gonna have to find a new lead rig for my tubin'.

However, I watched Mrs. The Sav light niggers UP with the UMP, which made me change over to it. With a red dot (I ain't got no silencer yet), it shoots as smoothly and accurately as the SCAR, but twice as lethal. I'm gonna throw a silencer on that whore and put it to work.

BTW, I found three more fags in three more fag spots -- as Verno says, "So gay, he's just there to BE gay." Never ends, does it.

[Verno]

Apparently Infinity Ward is running a contest this week to see who can conjure up the gayest weapon. Tonight, I saw:

FAIL with Thermal Scope and Silencer
ACR with Heartbeat Sensor and Grenade Launcher
Mini Uzi with ACOG and Silencer
Throwing Knife with a string to tie it to your belt and an ACOG scope
Desert Eagle with a scope like what Galileo used to check out the moon and shit

The winner gets the most rigid plastic crank to shove up his life partner's butthole. Fun fun.

[Spooner]

Apparently Infinity Ward is running a contest this week to see who can conjure up the gayest weapon. Tonight, I saw:

FAIL with Thermal Scope and Silencer
ACR with Heartbeat Sensor and Grenade Launcher
Mini Uzi with ACOG and Silencer
Throwing Knife with a string to tie it to your belt and an ACOG scope
Desert Eagle with a scope like what Galileo used to check out the moon and shit

The winner gets the most rigid plastic crank to shove up his life partner's butthole. Fun fun.

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:



Anything Melon rolls with ... is usually pretty gay. lol

[melon]

You guys are just jealous of my Frederick Zoller-like sniping ability.

[Spooner]

You guys are just jealous of my Frederick Zoller-like sniping ability.


With my gun in your sack, "At this range, I'm a REAL FREDERICK ZOLLER."


lmao

[The Sav]

Now there's two guns pointed at his sack.

[Spooner]

I'm doin' a lotta texting in the odd times I have for trigger time, and everyone but Melon seems to be down for rollin'. Melon, did a new wrestling game come out with nude men wearing singlets? I can't figure out why killing homos has suddenly lost its appeal to you.

lol


LET'S ROLL, RETARDS!!!

[The Sav]

Uh... I ain't seen a single text from YOU since we last played (which was Wednesday), so don't gimme that. I'm going on at 10:30am TODAY if yer down. So be sure there's a sock stuffed in yer baby's grill. lol j/k

[Spooner]

Considering you see/reply to one out of every 10 of my text pages, I'm not surprised.


lol j/k Wedge rules POM lives in a treehouse with Justin Timerlake ... and they kiss.

[The BYP]

lol j/k Wedge rules POM lives in a treehouse with Justin Timerlake ... and they kiss.

lmao lmao lmao lmao

[The Sav]

Considering you see/reply to one out of every 10 of my text pages, I'm not surprised.


lol j/k Wedge rules POM lives in a treehouse with Justin Timerlake ... and they kiss.


At least I answer my goddamn phone! lmao lmao lmao

lol, j/k Timberlake is bringing sexy back... to POM, Russ wants to give Lady Gaga a "handy" and Dead Lion thinks asshole is two words. lol

[Pull Out Method]

Christ.

lmao lmao lmao

[Dr. P]

At least Mustard proved that she had a meaty pussy and not a knob. Christ, I only posted that poll on accounta it was slow and I had heard Shirley Phelps Roper had "written" a song about Go hating lady Gaga for bein'a whore. I had no idea she was rumored to have dick -I had never even seen a picture of her until I Google imaged her to start that thread.

[The Sav]

Sure... riiiiight... Uhhhh-huh. Admit it, you want him/her.

[Dr. P]

I admit I like that gamy meaty delicious poon. If there's a dick there, I'm out. Or would do like Lee says. Is she really that big of a star? Until Kevin and Bean and O&A, I barely knew the name, let alone all the Internet chatter about her meat box. Christ, I must be gettin' old.

[Verno]

Protest too much, perhaps?

I should be game fir keelin' some fags this weekend.

[The Sav]

You know, Verno... I remember seeing that you only had about 10 or 12 hours more of gameplay than I had when we last played (10 days ago). Now you got like 3 days on me! lmao lmao lmao

I think it's safe to say that you will FOR SURE be down for some fag killin' this weekend. ;-)

ps. I'll be there too, lol

[lelionestmort]

At least I answer my goddamn phone! lmao lmao lmao

lol, j/k Timberlake is bringing sexy back... to POM, Russ wants to give Lady Gaga a "handy" and Dead Lion thinks asshole is two words. lol

holy shit your right asshole is one word :-k my life has lost all meaning. Also am I the only one who was sad when they nuked the Capitol? For some reason that really bummed me out I was fine with killing the Russian civies though so clearly I'm insane.

[The Sav]

Uhhh... okay.

[Spooner]

holy shit your right asshole is one word :-k my life has lost all meaning. Also am I the only one who was sad when they nuked the Capitol? For some reason that really bummed me out I was fine with killing the Russian civies though so clearly I'm insane.

Oh. Is this Leona here the frog I've been hearing about lately? Don't need to know much about you, Froggy, other than that you're a frog -- to get started.


Welcome to SFJ -- care for some Freedom fries?



http://img109.imageshack.us/img109/5531/ihatefrogs.jpg (http://img109.imageshack.us/i/ihatefrogs.jpg/)

[lelionestmort]

Nice to meet you Spooner. :tip: You ought to know that that pic burns worse than that time I had a urinary tract infection. Congratulations. And yes some freedom fries would be much appreciated right about now, an invasion of Iraq and a great "Mission Accomplished" banner would also hit the spot. But I think we all know how it's going to come out, to quote R.C. "like oxtail soup."

[Spooner]

No, I heard the French are finally gonna pull their weight in Iraq -- someone told 'em they found truffles in Baghdad.

[Verno]

I sometimes wonder if IW intentionally includes glitches to keep gameplay fresh. There's a new, REALLY HOMO glitch. When you call in an emergency airdrop (the one that drops 4), and you only open 3, it will keep sending airdrops as long as there is one unopened.

It's really annoying when there are 4 harriers, 2 pavelows, an AC130 in the air. So obviously I back out.

Except for last night. I probably made the choad cry. I saw he was pulling that shit, so I dropped a couple of boombastic turds on him, stole his last 3 care packages (which were a pavelow, uav, and chopper gunner!) and greased his gay little teammates until they had enough and bailed.

I love that shit.

[Spooner]

:rofl:

Verno, while he and I are getting SHELLED literally every three seconds by air-pigs from said drop-boxes: "Dude ... this ain't no way ta play -- look, there's already what, like six birds above us?!! Jeeeeeezus!" :rofl:

[The Sav]

Seriously... There's things about this new version that are SO goddamn cool. But... there are other things about the game that almost ruin the game for everyone but the 2% of super-fags out there that get to enjoy the things that the rest of us say "Ah, that's bullshit."

Like the other night... I hopped on for like 45 minutes and the very second I get into my first game, I see just about every plane, jet, bomber, bird, chopper, Harrier, UFO, whatever, there is to have. At one point I half expected to see the Starship Enterprise shooting photons at me and seeing "You've been killed by William Shattner" on the screen. Christ!

And what makes it worse, it's they're all being operated or AI'd by the same two goddamn faggots what have a 215-2 K/D ratio. I mean, it already sucks balls, but at least I'd feel a little better about it if all them flying saucers were being activated by several different players instead of the same two homos who've done nothing but play MW2 for 17 full days since they bought the game 18 days ago.... lolwages, boner, Booze lives in the year 2015 and doesn't work, Maker ditched the SLDummy and became sorta funny somehow, TBL loves Taco, Belasco thinks he's Ebert AND Roper, This message was sent using Nick-nack-paddy-wack on POM's iphone.

[TheWagesofSin]

faggots

[TheWagesofSin]

Just testing out the new software. Everything works great.

[moneymaker]

Just testing out the new software. Everything works great.

Praise the Lord!

[Spooner]

lmao lmao lmao

[Booze]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yLi-zTOLUbc

[The Sav]

That was funny but I think it was planned. I mean, who would post a vid of themselves trying to get over and then failing miserably?

[Booze]

Fine. You don't like my MW2 vids, I won't post shit. It's about time I finished my studio, anyway.

Lol.

[The Sav]

Sure Booze. Just be sure to email a few of us a year from now and make a bunch of empty promises about how you plan on checking in to the site soon. lolz.

[Dr. P]

TBL Boss fucking sucks. I can't get over that, I really can't. He's fair game for 'choppery by now, and it's time we fire up that program around here anyways.

[lelionestmort]

That was funny but I think it was planned. I mean, who would post a vid of themselves trying to get over and then failing miserably?

I would.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j2y8tYHLF90&feature=PlayList&p=098B285F9435786C&index=11

And Moneymaker try not to get too turned on seeing all those Nazis. Next thing you'll know people will think you like Obama.
http://www.ifc.com/makemediamatter/adolph-obama.jpg

[Dr. P]

lmao lmao lmao

:score:


Feeds fire

[melon]

Info on new MW2 maps.

http://www.gamespot.com/news/6253609.html?tag=latestheadlines;title;2

[Verno]

Nice. They're bringing back Crash and Overgrown. Two pretty good choices. And it's supposed to be released at the end of this month.

We need to coordinate one afternoon where all us choads can roll together.

[Spooner]

This is gonna be huge.

Maybe we can get Niggerheiser to stop blowing up his Xboxes and get the fuck back in the mix. Fuckin' stoner. Where's that asshole been, anyhow.

[melon]

Yep, as soon as God of War Mania is done at my house, i'm getting back on the MW action. :tip:

[Spooner]

Yeah, Mel ... shit ... between you & Verno wearing capes & carrying scepters ... Tabasco playing Peggle For Men, & The Sav playing Solitary Confinement Lite ... Joe Dirt's the only cat I can roll MW2 with anymore. 'Sco!

[Belasco]

Peggle?! Sheeeee-iiit. I gotta run a Call of Cthulhu game next month. I don't have time for Peggle.

I am coming up on some much needed vacation time next week and will probably be able to play some MW2.

[The Sav]

Fuck Overgrown, that map sucked balls. But Crash?? Hells yes! That was one of my all time favs. The newer maps sound pretty cool too. Now all they gotta do is ditch the ban on having private parties in Domination and lose the testicle nuke bullshit for the fags what get 25 kills in the first 3 minutes.

[lelionestmort]

I used a nuke once. It was quite cool.

[The Sav]

But was it a testicle nuke?

[lelionestmort]

sorry but I'm unaware of the meaning of the word "testicle" in this particular instance. Do you mean did I earn legitimately and not by a care package or emergency airdrop?

[The Sav]

I referred to it was a testicle nuke as opposed to the proper "tactical nuke" because I think the whole idea of using a nuke and ending the game early is lame and gay and stupid. It was just a play on words.

[lelionestmort]

Clever. No, the one time I used it was in the like last 50 seconds but the team I was on was winning anyway so it didn't change anything but it was certainly bitchin' as vintage RC would say.

[Booze]

From Football365...


Ever worry that footballers have too much time on their hands? Concerned they might not be engaging in the most wholesome activities? Fretting that they aren't giving their brains the workout that their bodies are getting?

Well fear no more, for Darren Bent has reassured us.

Speaking in Shortlist magazine, he revealed that in many ways, footballers are just spotty 14-year-old dorks at heart.

"There are about 20 of us (at Sunderland) who play Call of Duty online every day without fail. Kieran Richardson's the best; he's called 'Vendetta¹. Kenwyne Jones is hopeless, because he doesn't put the hours in.

"We played against Stoke City, who have a few who play, and we battered them, we absolutely annihilated them. Danny Collins (ex-Sunderland, now Stoke) arranged it. I've heard Chelsea have a little team so we're hoping to go against them next."

[lelionestmort]

Maybe that's Real Madrid's problem. Would explain how Lyon kicked the most expensive team in history's ass. Too much MW2, shame on you CR. Of course that doesn't explain how Real has failed to get past the round of 16 for six consecutive years now lmao lmao lmao

[Booze]

Real Madrid sack their coach every fucking season for not winning the CL, even if he wins the league & the Copa Del Ray. They've had some of the best managers in the business, but won't give them a chance to put a coherent side together. Their presidents are only interested in getting re-elected, and the manager is always the scapegoat when things go wrong. That's no way to run a football club.

Ain't that right, 'Maker?

[Spooner]

Don't mind me -- I accidentally clicked on the Human Foosball 2 thread.

[Booze]

It's alright. Go back out, turn left at the Poupon thread & carry on til you see Verno talking about how his boss wants him to wear shorts to work tomorrow.

[lelionestmort]

Real Madrid sack their coach every fucking season for not winning the CL, even if he wins the league & the Copa Del Ray. They've had some of the best managers in the business, but won't give them a chance to put a coherent side together. Their presidents are only interested in getting re-elected, and the manager is always the scapegoat when things go wrong. That's no way to run a football club.

Ain't that right, 'Maker?

Couldn't agree more Booze. And it's a shame, all that money all that talent wasted because the fans and the ownership never give a manager a chance. You can buy great players but you can't buy great teams, it takes time, patience and commitment to the task at hand. Something Real Madrid hasn't had years. But it's fun watching Real flunk out of the CL like usual. :-)

[Spooner]

I'm starting think this choadster up here ^^ ain't even a frog, but more likely the Injun whore in Bend It Like Buckner, or whatever the fuck that gay movie was.

[The Sav]

Bend It Like Buckwheat is my favorite porno movie.

[Dr. P]

Really? I don't care for the interracial. I get about the same revulsion from it as if see gay or midget porn! Oh fuck, I'll change channels so fast as soon as I see a brother is about to taint a white girl. And black on black isn't anything I wanna see, either. I like my prOn girls white, young, and preferably with just each other or a dildo. And I don't even want that to be black.

[The Sav]

Who said anything about it being interracial? Buckwheat was bending it with that broad from Precious. It was the bews.

[Dr. P]

It's either black or interracial, either way, I'd rather watch beheading videos. Despite my user title.

[melon]

New map pack comes out tomorrow!

[Spooner]

Ohhhhhhhhhh ... it's on, fags. I don't wanna hear NO excuses. That goes for you, too, The Sav -- trigger time, white negro.

[Spooner]

Don't bother. In true MS form, the servers are toast; good luck signing on; good luck adding those gay pernts if you need 'em; good luck even staying connected to XBL more than half a second. Man, you can set your WATCH to these dumbasses' monkeyshines.

[melon]

I must say I've grown quite weary of these monkeyshines. That was the sound of my Walther pointed right at your testicles.

[Spooner]

^^:rofl:

I've had a gun pointed at YOUR testicles since you first sat down.



Well ... I tried again, and it seems to be getting a little better. And I mean a LITTLE. It's the day where all the raggedy-ass kids ditch school and clog up the servers. Only us jobless adults should be allowed to play for the first week.

[Spooner]

'Sco, homos!

Verno -- buddy -- pal -- hit pause on that game and let's kill some jerkoffs! Sav ... WHERE YOU AT?!! The new maps are bitchin' -- especially the condo complex one.


Melwood slayed me last night: We're on a new map, and he was about five feet behind me as we see some faggot thinkin' he's sweet jumping through some concrete hole, trying to get over Master Chief style. I lobbed a sticky frag right on his sack and separated his limbs and head from his torso.
...
Melon: "Oh, dude ... I *saw* that! <the inimitable Melon laugh ensues> ... You just sent him to hell on a shutter." :rofl: :rofl:

Never a more well-timed Lloyd referenced dropped.

*If anyone's down, I'm a be rollin' for the next hour or so.

[melon]

Apparently there's an auto-aiming glitch and a glitch to see through walls. I'll post more info as i research. These fags make me wanna stop playing this game. Thanks go Tiger comes out next Tuesdee.

[Heap]

"Tuesdee" lmao lmao

[Spooner]

There should be a crossover MW2/Tiger 11 glitch. Me & Mel get to bring our MW2 choads into Tiger 11 when CurtisTheNinja's on the 17th tee box in a tourney.

He hits a draw goin' nicely left with the dogleg & Melon, hiding in a glitch spot in a tree, snipes his ball mid-flight as it turns into puff of white chalk. I roll up behind him in a golf cart with a shotgun and put a round in the back of his head ... then keep beating his carcass with the 7-iron I hoarked outta his golf bag.

[Spooner]

This tale had to be told ... (and it's only for those who can handle more than one sentence):

The new maps came out yesterday on Modern Divorce 2, and they brought back Vacant & Strike from 4. Well, me & Melanoma are rollin' on Vacant, and we're no strangers to the game OR the map obviously. We usually place in the top 3 or 4 regularly, alright. This is to say, we can usually keep some kinda lid on all manner of fags.

<as Bob Green>: "Wellllll ..."

Game starts and this jerkoff (can't remember his name, but let's call him "Growler" -- it was something akin to turds or taking one) cracks off about 10 kills on me in a row. I'm not talkin' about any cat-&-mouse action, neither -- I mean, I literally would spawn and this motherfucker'd have a bullet waiting for my dome. Always in my dome, too -- never in my balls or gut.

I'm so stunned by this shelling I'm getting by this one asshole, that I comment to Melon about him, and Melon laughs, not having caught a whiff of this faggot yet. By the time this cocksucker's racked up 25 kills on me in the first three minutes of the game (and I ain't ever seen him once) ... Melon goes, "OHHHH! Motherrrrrr FUCKER!!!" ... "UGH!!! COCKsucker!!!!" ... then Mel goes, "Dude, this asshole 'Growler' just kilt me about 10 times in a row!!" Believe it or not, this was too shocking an incident for me to even laugh at the time (and Melon was equally distressed).

He even caromed a bullet OFF MY CABBAGE and right into MELON'S FOREHEAD!!! NO BULLSHIT. One bullet, two corpses: me & Milwood. X's for eyes.

By the time this slaughter-house bonanza ended, this douchebag had 58 KILLS and only died 11 times (probably the 11 times he ran out of bullets and some clown dropped a frag in his pants). And the worst of it, was that 29 kills were ME, and the other 29 kills were Melon. We were both apoplectic, ... and we both quietly agreed it was time to leave the lobby and gather ourselves. I told Melon I hadn't had my lunch fed to me like that since 1998 during Halo 1 when some lifer called Bob Barker killed me like 78 times in about five minutes. I had to just turn away from the TV and stare out at the lake ... absorb some nature. Reevaluate my life.

Melon had to do the same thing. Melon goes, "Yeah, man ... uhhh ... I ain't never seen anything like that -- he wasn't cheating either ... he was camping the whole map." (:rofl:) Melon: "Yeah, dude ... <sigh> ... ummm ... I'm gonna have ta take a knee after that one." :rofl: x1000000000

:rofl: When this was all going on, it was so surreal that we were calling him "Neo" ... and Melon said he saw him grab a bullet with his thumb and index finger, turn it around, and let it fly back right in Melon's face. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: I mean, I could live 10 lifetimes and never get my ass handed to me like that again ... inexplicably, too. There was just no 'splainin' it. Once he collared Melon, he goes, "Dude, I think he got sick of greasin' YOU and now he's all over ME!"


Hoooooooooooooooooooooooooo DOGGIES.

[Booze]

:rofl::rofl::rofl:

I heard this story first hand last night. And for those of you who read it & just shrugged your shoulders... YOU WEREN'T THERE, MAN.

[Spooner]

There's a new map called Carnival, and it's just that. So IN this Haji carnival, there exists a country (lolz) ... There's this big tin missile with a ladder going up it, of course leaving a little opening for fags to camp.

Even more than me, Melon will NOT stand for anyone in there, and it's the only time I've seen him expose himself like Speirs in Band of Brothers to get that homo outta his fag spot.

He'll moan & through gritted teeth say, "Ohhhhh, there's a cocksucker up in the dickhole!" He'll usually counter-snipe the faggot, but if Mel gets kilt more 'an ONCE by the same homo up there, here's what happens (and to behold it from my perspective w/out him knowing I could see this was priceless):

Melon ain't gonna surgically remove this recitivist camper no more, so I see him hot-foot it out in the open, two life partners crackin' off shots at him as he bobs & weaves his way to the base entrance of the tin wiener. As he's getting shot at from two sides, I see Melon aim his rifle straight up the wiener and empty a full clip up there. "Tango down!" you hear, then you see Melon's skull & crossbones.

With a vindication in his voice I've never heard, he goes, "OH, MAN!! I just sent an entire clip up Eliza Dushku's asshole. He's done."

To see it go down ... classic.


:rofl: x the size of England's goalie's Michael Jackson twirlin' glove.

[melon]

fuck modern warfare, that game stinks.