View Full Version : Which Phil Hendrie Show Character can win in a fight?
Who'd be the victor in a fist fight? I couldn't have too many options, so I had to pick and choose the top contenders.
Boomstick
12-08-2005, 02:07 PM
Doug Danger - His gay eye would let him see what the other fighter is going to do, it seems to see everything else according to him.
Raj Fahneen
12-08-2005, 02:13 PM
Wouldn't want to run into him after he put away a bottle of cutty in the hot tub.
Jeff Dowder
12-08-2005, 02:25 PM
Jay Santos without a doubt. He knows so many takedown moves, so much, in fact, that an older bit has an LAPD officer asking Jay if the LAPD Academy authorized Jay to use their moves.
McElroy
12-08-2005, 02:40 PM
Dr. Sadler lifts weights, and would clearly dominate with his scissorkicks wearing only a leapard print thong. Doug Danger would be in too much of a stupor at the sight of him to fight properly.
westernestates
12-08-2005, 03:07 PM
Vernon has all of that built anger and he would tear the sheards of any of those light-weights on that poll.
Sessy Chris Norton
12-08-2005, 03:14 PM
I had to go with Amarka. If I remember correctly, he is a Karate expert that takes his Karate school to movies to show them new moves. When another movie patron complains, he gives them the round-house kick right there in the theater.
jonusboneman
12-08-2005, 03:53 PM
what about lloyd, i think he would kick ass more than any of them and if he lost he would run you down with his winabego.
Bob Green
12-08-2005, 03:56 PM
Vernon would slit your throat while you slept. That's how he rolls. The smart money is on Vernon. He may get his ass kicked in a bar fight but you bet your sweet ass he'll find you and when he does, forget it, brother. You're toast.
the deta
12-08-2005, 04:13 PM
Jay Santos without a doubt. He knows so many takedown moves, so much, in fact, that an older bit has an LAPD officer asking Jay if the LAPD Academy authorized Jay to use their moves.
EXACTLY
Daniel Ruoss
12-08-2005, 05:02 PM
Vernon has all of that built anger and he would tear the sheards of any of those light-weights on that poll.
Yep. Vernon is the kind of guy thats eventually going to face manslaughter charges!
Boomstick
12-08-2005, 05:08 PM
Poor Chris, no one thinks him fighting is sessy.
Anonymous
12-08-2005, 05:19 PM
Jay Santos without a doubt. He knows so many takedown moves, so much, in fact, that an older bit has an LAPD officer asking Jay if the LAPD Academy authorized Jay to use their moves.
He's out of the closet for 3 months and mad as hell.
westernestates
12-08-2005, 05:26 PM
I just realized something, where's Llyod and Harvey? They both been in the military. Llyod has killed and threatened so many people on the show that it comes to him as second nature sort of like wiping his ass.
ricola
12-08-2005, 05:42 PM
Yep. Vernon is the kind of guy thats eventually going to face manslaughter charges!
And I dont care if I go to jail!
IrvingFarquare
12-08-2005, 05:56 PM
It would all be fun & games until Jay simply had to take it to the next level. Who knows what would happen but I'm sure it wouldn't be good.
OWWWT
12-08-2005, 06:18 PM
Gay Eye.... What are you gonna do?
I just realized something, where's Llyod and Harvey? They both been in the military. Llyod has killed and threatened so many people on the show that it comes to him as second nature sort of like wiping his ass.
I had to put as few as possible. On account of Lloyd and Harvey's age, they simply couldn't make the cut. Let's not forget, just a few weeks ago Justin McElroy kicked Lloyd's ass.
Anyway, I think it would be between Vernon Dozier and Jim Sadler. Jim Sadler's edge is simply that he's really strong. Vernon, though, is the kind of guy with not only a bloodthursty temper, but is the type of guy that would have fought enough to be pretty good at it.
As for Jay Santos, the reason I wouldn't place him above Dozier is because in that one bit he said he got his ass kicked by three black kids in the subway. Dozier or Sadler would be able to overpower three teenagers.
Jim Sadler would stick his pinky finger out at you and scream , OHH YEAHHH, like Randy "The Macho Man" Savage
KungFuJesus
12-08-2005, 09:43 PM
I voted for Doug. Listen to how confrontational he is. I think he'd tear a guy apart and leave him butt-up with a flower in it. He's an angry, angry gay.
Sessy Chris Norton
12-08-2005, 11:57 PM
I voted for Doug. Listen to how confrontational he is. I think he'd tear a guy apart and leave him butt-up with a flower in it. He's an angry, angry gay.
Doug's anger aside...most gay guys I've met weren't all that intimidating...to say the least!!! Some of the Lesbian women on the other hand. You get a 2 stroke diesel Dyke...in flannel...even Jay Santos is a bit scared of them.
GeneralSantos
12-09-2005, 01:07 AM
Wasn't it Vernon who once said he went into a bar in a black part of town to get his ass kicked and make sure he wouldn't cry? I think he also has his wife run over his hand and kick him in the balls every day as well. My money's on him in a fight.
GenJohnsonJameson
12-09-2005, 01:12 AM
Wasn't it Vernon who once said he went into a bar in a black part of town to get his ass kicked and make sure he wouldn't cry? I think he also has his wife run over his hand and kick him in the balls every day as well. My money's on him in a fight.
He went into a bar in a notoriously black suburb of Orlando called Eatonville. He held a cigarette up in the air and said, "any of you boogies got a light?" A mule, the mascot of Bellmar Academy, gets lined up in front of the football team once a week to kick Vernon in the crotch.
He may be able to take a beating, but he has never proved he can beat anyone else up.
Austin Amarca has taken on hurricanes, a man is nothing.
GeneralSantos
12-09-2005, 01:18 AM
Austin Amarca has taken on hurricanes, a man is nothing.
I thought he ran away from the hurricane. He was going slow and mocking it, but he was running away, I believe.
GenJohnsonJameson
12-09-2005, 01:34 AM
Austin Amarca has taken on hurricanes, a man is nothing.
I thought he ran away from the hurricane. He was going slow and mocking it, but he was running away, I believe.
Yeah, but he drove no faster than someone taking a sunday drive. He put on a couple Dwight Yoakham CD's, ate an egg salad sandwich and laughed as he could tell this angering the hurricane. He also went eyeball to eyeball with it, spit at it and pissed in it's direction.
New From Peenman
12-09-2005, 03:19 AM
Ted Bell would bake you like a potato. Wrap you in tin foil and cover you in butter. Then slice you up and serve you with a Rum and Coke.
threefingersofcutty
12-09-2005, 04:57 AM
I know we couldn't fit everybody on the list, and he is old, but while those Normandy boys fought a bunch of scared German kids Lloyd was slugging it out against the crack Chinaman.
Lloyd blacks out when he fights, he once woke up with a hand full of chest hair.
I'll list some pros and cons of these characters:
Vernon Dozier intentionally got his ass kicked by three (or four) black guys and laughed all the way through it. He would also have his wife back the car over his hands once a week and would have a mule kick him in the groin once a week (speaking of which, Wyatt Earp's father was discharded from the army because he got kicked in the groin by a mule, so that's gotta be pretty tough gettin' it once a week). He once sent a father running scared when he came to Vernon's house to get his daughter. I also recall him talking about how parents of students dong like him because of how athletic he is and they know that he can kick their asses. He's also claimed that he's so hard that if his daughter were to die, he would simply say, "Adiós, you're a ghost." He also has the most violent temper of any Phil Hendrie character. I can't think of anything about this character that I've ever heard to put him down as far as being tough goes.
Austin Amarka was, in one bit, a martial artist, though that character changes so much that that may have only have been for that one bit. He also claims to have side stepped a bear and left it running off a cliff, as well have having jumped a bear and slitting its throat from ear to ear, though it was implied that he was lying about that as well. He also "eyeballed" the hurricane, but nontheless, it did run him out of town. He also got his ass kicked by an angry father of a child that went to "Camp Troubled Eagle."
Jay Santos is a police guy and all, but he got his ass handed to him by three teenagers.
Let's not forget that Doug Dannger is, like, 6'4," and he would beat up a lot of gay guys he would see in bars... Doug Dannger is the biggest gay basher in this show, isn't he?
Although Lloyd Bonafide talks in a violent mannger and often does wreckless things, the bottom line is that he's too old to compete with these other guys. He's never proven that he's anything more than an angry old man with a bit mouth and some guns. Plus Justin McElroy kicked his ass. Same goes for Harvey Wireman.
riboflavin
12-09-2005, 12:21 PM
Vernon Dozier would go Bakersfield Chimp all over the competition.
Come to think of it, this would make a great video game, along the likes of Street Fighter and all of the nonsense.
Jeff Dowder
12-09-2005, 12:42 PM
No sir, no sir, no sir.
All you people have to remember that Jay got his ass handed to him by three black teenagers, and on the Phil Hendrie Show, black guys can kick anyone's ass. So that's not exactly fair.
Jay Santos, cause all those guys will be really tough when he does the three-step takedown on them (another subcommander gets on his hands and knees behind the suspect and then the suspect is pushed over them) and they are swarmed, hooded, handcuffed, and thrown into the back of a CAP minivan.
Of course, they would then be "cast down with the sodomites" in the nearest substation detention facility.
Verno
02-28-2006, 11:52 AM
Kinda gyping Lloyd here. I think Vernon would still kick his ass, but no love for the old fiesty Lloyd? He's a Korean war veteran, dammit!
1000 Posts, DUTCHBAGS!!!!!!!
5AlarmChili
02-28-2006, 01:29 PM
I think Brass Villanueva should get a shot at the title. When Brass goes vida loca all bets are off.
Mr. Irrelevant
02-28-2006, 03:34 PM
Vernon would slit your throat while you slept. That's how he rolls. The smart money is on Vernon. He may get his ass kicked in a bar fight but you bet your sweet ass he'll find you and when he does, forget it, brother. You're toast.
Yeaaahahahaha!!! I would have to concur. Vernon is one bitter S.O.B. and he's obviously kicking some ass in the poll too.
The Larry
02-28-2006, 03:40 PM
Vernon would slit your throat while you slept. That's how he rolls. The smart money is on Vernon. He may get his ass kicked in a bar fight but you bet your sweet ass he'll find you and when he does, forget it, brother. You're toast.
Yeaaahahahaha!!! I would have to concur. Vernon is one bitter S.O.B. and he's obviously kicking some ass in the poll too.
Damn straight. Vernon is one guy you wouldn't want to meet in a dark allie. He put his fist through a Barby CD player and it didn't move! Imagine what that would feel like if he did that to a human? One thing is for sure, Vernon's victim wouldn't be leaving in one piece. Don't fuck around with Dozier!
Dr. Gonzo
02-28-2006, 04:10 PM
All I can say is: Do you have a stadium named after you?
BowlHaircut
02-28-2006, 05:28 PM
Vernon Dozier is definitely the resident tough guy on the PHS. He wears spurs!
The Dude
02-28-2006, 05:57 PM
What? No Walter Belhaven? Walter would win the fight, kill his opponent, kill everyone in the bar...and their families...and then burn down the bar.
The Larry
02-28-2006, 06:03 PM
What? No Walter Belhaven? Walter would win the fight, kill his opponent, kill everyone in the bar...and their families...and then burn down the bar.
Walter would tear his opponent's throat out for a farthing, then he'd kill him. Doug Dannger or Chris Norton winning a fight? C'mon, dude! Get reeeeeeeal! Brad Rifkin might win, so would Jay Santos, but about Dr. Sadaler, meh, too much oiling up and lifting nude in his front yard. My vote goes to Vernon. As I said before, he's one dude you wouldn't want to meet in a dark allie.
Who actually thinks Dannger could take Jim Sadler the BODYBUILDER. I mean will you come ON already??
kerrycollins
03-01-2006, 07:45 PM
Dr. Jim...'cause he's FRICKIN' RIIIIIPPPPPEEEDDD!!!
drjimsadler
03-10-2006, 12:48 AM
Dr. Sadler is "buffed and ripped" by his own admission and he can do wrestling moves like the Slingshot Powerbomb and the Human Torture Rack.......I can't picture any of these other jokers holding a candle to the Doctor...
Mr. Irrelevant
03-10-2006, 01:34 AM
Yo Dr. Jim, your avatar should be one of a pro wrestler or a body builder and however they are... is...was...look like and all that.... stuff, yeah!!! :thumbsup: :thumbsup:
drjimsadler
03-10-2006, 07:45 PM
Yo Dr. Jim, your avatar should be one of a pro wrestler or a body builder and however they are... is...was...look like and all that.... stuff, yeah!!! :thumbsup: :thumbsup:
Yeah, I thought about getting an avatar of some old leathery guy who is buffed out, but decided on this one since it makes the Dr. a bit more lurid and demented...and mysterious!
Mr. Irrelevant
03-10-2006, 07:47 PM
Yo Dr. Jim, your avatar should be one of a pro wrestler or a body builder and however they are... is...was...look like and all that.... stuff, yeah!!! :thumbsup: :thumbsup:
Yeah, I thought about getting an avatar of some old leathery guy who is buffed out, but decided on this one since it makes the Dr. a bit more lurid and demented...and mysterious!
and :gay:
I'm kidding :poke:
drjimsadler
03-10-2006, 09:16 PM
Yo Dr. Jim, your avatar should be one of a pro wrestler or a body builder and however they are... is...was...look like and all that.... stuff, yeah!!! :thumbsup: :thumbsup:
Yeah, I thought about getting an avatar of some old leathery guy who is buffed out, but decided on this one since it makes the Dr. a bit more lurid and demented...and mysterious!
and :gay:
I'm kidding :poke:
Hahahaha....now that you mention it......
I did google images for "doctor" and stumbled on this for my avatar, but after checking the dude's site out a little more, he has other works that may be worthy for future consideration
http://www.feckweed.com/art.htm
...check out his "older" artwork link, some good stuff there.
and hey---LONG LIVE VERA KATZ
Mr. Irrelevant
03-10-2006, 10:26 PM
and hey---LONG LIVE VERA KATZ
Well I don't know if you were joking or not regarding Katz, but that Tom "Harry" Potter guy seems like a complete Skull crushing douche bag. I'm glad my kids don't go to school in that District.
drjimsadler
03-11-2006, 03:32 PM
and hey---LONG LIVE VERA KATZ
Well I don't know if you were joking or not regarding Katz, but that Tom "Harry" Potter guy seems like a complete Skull crushing douche bag. I'm glad my kids don't go to school in that District.
half joking on Katz....I think she was okay...and she did crack down on the bratty skateboarders riding on the sidewalks, buzzing pedestrians...I remember how up in arms the skateboarders got over that, and I must admit I rather enjoyed it..."haha" (*Herb Sewell laugh)
Potter is a douche, I agree....
Crappin_Razor_Blades
03-12-2006, 02:41 AM
Vernon is a tough guy. The biggest PHS pussy has got to be Steve Bosell
BowlHaircut
03-12-2006, 09:39 AM
Vernon is a tough guy. The biggest PHS pussy has got to be Steve BosellI think if you got RC into some real action, he'd be quicker to wuss out. Steve would at least take a punch to get it on camera for his attorney.
brooksy556
03-12-2006, 10:08 AM
If push came to shove, Lloyd would have sex with thier skulls. I think we all agree that when you do that, you pretty much won the fight.
lawyer said write it down
03-12-2006, 04:49 PM
Even though Men should only kick Mens asses If there is any woman who would kick ass it has to be Bobbie who would feel justifed in kickin anyones ass who got between her and her meat.
Russy's girlfriend
03-12-2006, 05:15 PM
Chris Norton, simply because he eats at the Russy Pelican and he's so da'yum sessy that he would turn a straight, angry man into a :gay: limp-wrister ...and boy, then he could take him. :wink:
josie1984
03-13-2006, 08:35 PM
Austin Amarka .this guy wouldnt just fight . he would find some sick way to kill all of them.
Shoot Out A Log
03-14-2006, 01:32 AM
Yeah, he'd give ya a gut check and then counter with a block 'n roll.
beaver_clever
03-21-2006, 03:36 PM
I had to say Jay, but I think Roland Schwinn would win. He would just eat his opponent.
peteC
07-17-2006, 11:32 AM
I'd say Walter Bellhaven. He'd be eating his breakfast, watch the fight begin, daintily wipe the corners of his mouth with his napkin, and then before you know it, everyone else would be hanging from meathooks, bled white.
Verno
07-17-2006, 11:35 AM
I want you all to remember this thread when voting in the "Ultimate Character Poll: Round 2" thread.
<<<<< Knuckle sandwich.
the deta
07-17-2006, 03:36 PM
I want you all to remember this thread when voting in the "Ultimate Character Poll: Round 2" thread.
<<<<< Knuckle sandwich.
lmao lmao
Jay Santos could take you down like phreak with a cold root beer.
Dr._Bud
07-27-2006, 05:06 PM
Who'd be the victor in a fist fight? I couldn't have too many options, so I had to pick and choose the top contenders.
You left out the two most important! Lloyd who, when messed with, is sure to "put some color in your face." Secondly Bud who, as a retard, has vastly improved strength over your average man.
CommunistaCow
07-28-2006, 02:35 PM
Dozier. Geesh, the man's freakin' psychotic for crying out loud. When Vernon snaps, bad things happen.
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